now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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