are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
