i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
We're too hungover to prance.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
Randomize