Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
he fucked my hip out of place.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Randomize