Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
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