Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
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