Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
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