saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
