We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Randomize
