I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Randomize