it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Randomize
