apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
