Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize
