so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
