hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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