don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize