Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
I think i got beer on your cat.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
