the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
