dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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