i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Michael Bay diarrhea
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
