is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
