I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
