he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize
