Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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