Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Randomize