Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
