So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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