just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
