I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Randomize
