so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
