since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
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