Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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