Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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