I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
