I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
She's the barista slut.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Randomize
