He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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