Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
