I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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