And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I want to fling myself into the sun
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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