there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Randomize
