i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
