Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Randomize