Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Randomize