so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
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