don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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