Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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