We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
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