Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Houston, we have a squirter
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Randomize
