I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
She's like a pop up book from hell.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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