Where is the hickey?
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
