after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
Randomize